Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Mar 28, 2008 14:26:28 GMT -7
Friday March 28th 2008[/b] I'm starting this diary for no particular reason. Oh, what the hell. No, that's not true.
I'm starting this diary because I want to pour my feelings out. I can't tell Molly or Arthur. They would never understand.
Okay, okay! I'M IN LOVE!!! The Head Boy, Padril Crennant. Okay, maybe not love, but crush, or whatever else you wanna call it.
I've never experinced love, any type or degree. I'm not gonna be like Jaden or Saint Bridget and ask him out, because:
- He asked Suki Samini (5th Year) out
- He probably hates me.
- And he probably never thinks about me
Right. We met in Potions class. Professor Cruz chose us partners for Polyjuice Potion. I got him. I swear Cruz is a matchmaker (though that doesn't apply to Jaden and Aethie).
What am I supposed to do? I guess I'll just keep it inside and as a secret. I'd die if Padril read this now.
Stacey Amber[/size][/color]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Mar 29, 2008 8:44:19 GMT -7
Saturday March 29th 2008[/u]
I've made up my mind, not to think about Padril. It's 1 in 100 000 that he will ask me out. Or anything.
He likes Suki a lot, and she is pretty nice. Alicia and Suki are one of the nicest in that year. No, everybody there is nice.
I will NOT look at him much, which will prove difficult, seeing as I have to be working with him in Potions for the next month and a half. I won't look at him either.
I wonder what it's like to have a boy like you. I don't know. Jaden knows, of course. According to some people, lots of the boys like me, but I just wish Padril was among them.
Funny thing is that I promised not to talk about Padril or think about him, but that's all I've been doing for the last week, and his name is filling up these pages. Okay, I'm breaking my promise right now. I'll think about him and write about him, but I will NOT talk/look at him much. I know I'll do something stupid if I break this promise.
He hates me and I know it. Potions class is becoming like a torture. It used to be fun.
Stacey Amber[/size][/color]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Mar 30, 2008 17:35:15 GMT -7
Sunday March 30th, 2008[/u]
I've decided on two things. I'll either win him over, Jaden decided to help me, or listen to stuff and find something bd that will make me not want to come near him for the rest of my life.
Both are going to be hard. I'll choose #1 first. I don't understand why I like him. WHY WHY WHY?
I hope it works out all right for me and him. I don't know if i can do #2.
Stacey Amber[/size][/color]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Apr 3, 2008 16:28:37 GMT -7
Thursday April 3rd 2008
Right. Well, Jaden and I've got a plan. Jaden's going to ask Padril what his ideal girlfriend is. Then she'll drop a few ideas on him, sort of asking him 'Well what do you think?'. Jaden's soooooooo nice and I'll never repay her enough.
Dang! I met Suki the other day and she's so sweet and nice. How can I even think of competing with her? I am so mean.
I was kinda of hoping Padril was a passing fancy, but I think about him everyday twice. WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME?!
Stacey Amber[/font][/size]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Apr 5, 2008 15:25:13 GMT -7
Saturday April 5th, 2008
NO!!!!
I'm thinking of him even more! And it doesn't help that we're doing homework together, ALONE! Maybe not alone, but nobody else is supposed to interrupt. I owe Cruz so much, and I need repaying so much. Padril is like a torture and the best thing that ever happened. AM I GOING FREAKING INSANE?!
Pfft! I want to get over him, but I don't. Does that make sense?
No it doesn't. Nothing does anymore. Anyway, Scarlett's sick. I wish she could have been in school with me, but squibs happen anywhere and everywhere, without a choice. I feel sorry for her.
Stacey Amber[/size]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on May 10, 2008 15:24:17 GMT -7
Saturday May 10th, 2008Life's been hard, and easy, and hard and easy. Let's just say I've been too, er..... busy. Yeah, that's right, busy.
Oh what the freak! I've been doing nothin' 'cept think about him.
To keep me occupied, I'll write a short little line at the end of every entry, to describe my day, or my life. Which ever come comes first. (To me, that is.)
"Love.... Once you fall in it, you may never get out." [/center] Stacey Amber[/color]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on May 17, 2008 5:52:19 GMT -7
Thursday May 17th, 2008[/u] Well, this week has been so busy, that I haven't thought about him much.
This week was so filled with stress! NEWTs are coming up, and I've been franticly wracking my brain for anything that might help me through.
I've gotten so much homework, that yesterday, I thought I'd drown.
Anyway, Head of House Job Consultations are coming up. Mine would've been tommorow, but I had... other things to do. Or so I'd claimed. Ok, fine I admit it! I, Stacey Amber, have procastinated! I'm sorry!
Helen, being the 'soft' teacher, ate it up, and didn't question me. Bad news is, I didn't buy myself much time. Just an extra day. It'll be on Saturday.
Oh well... I want to be an Auror... Hope it goes well!
"Stressful is the life of those who love..." [/i] Stacey Amber[/size][/color]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Jun 2, 2008 15:51:41 GMT -7
Monday June 2nd, 2008[/u] WHOO! WHOO! I MADE IT! I HAVE THE QUALIFICATIONS OF AN AUROR! WHOO! YAY! ... Ahem. Well! You read it here first, folk.
I am capable of being an Auror, if I want to. I could even be a Healer. But I better buck up in Potions if I want to be admitted. Many in this school want to be 'in' and only a few can. So they will probably take the tops. I can't be a top, with only an E in Potions, now can I?
Well there you go. Another stress thing to add to my list. If there was a list.
About Padril... He's the only EFFING THING I have any interest on.
Now that's outta the way, let's get on to more pleasant thoughts, shall we?
I changed my looks, but only a tad. I met up with my muggle-born friend in the Leaky Cauldron. You know, Jesse. She's three years older than me, but about with double the fashion sense. She made me give myself a complete makeover. She said I look beautiful in the Avril Lavigne likeness. Huh.
Jesse says she's a beautiful Canadian singer. My reply: raised eyebrows. According to her, I looked like some Lindsay Lohan person. She's ugly, and everyone hates, or something like that. I agree with Jesse completely. Whoever she is. (I got no clue whatsoever, hon. Whatsoever.)
But I guess I do look pretty good. I know 'cause some 6th Years were looking at me... awed. As if... - ? I wonder what Padril will think/say.
"Beauty/Intelligence is what separates me from all of them dodo brains over there." [/i] Stacey Amber[/size][/color]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Jul 30, 2008 15:30:37 GMT -7
Wednesday July 30th, 2008 Well, it's been some time since I wrote. Lotssa stuff has happened. My auror training's starting in September, like. There was also the Grad party. My god!... It was fabulous. More about that later.
I'm trying to forget Padril. Hm... Not exactly working out. Whenever I'm in Hogsmeade, I almost pop into their shop.
"Cheers... Boy they grow up so fast! [/i] Stacey Amber[/font][/color]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Aug 23, 2008 8:27:14 GMT -7
Saturday August 23, 2008[/u] Hmph! I finally looked into the mirror. I'm surprised it didn't crack. Aidan assures me that there was a drastic improval. He says I look better as an imitaton of Avril something. Huh. Whatever.
Guess I should keep pictures of myself. Perhaps one day I can strike on tht perfect look, by combining my old looks. 'Kay!
See the difference? I think I look more elegant like this. Thanks Jesse!
I did something the other day that I totally regret. I went into Padril's shop. Oh my god... I acted totally weird and then I told him I had something to tell him. I said I'd come back... And I never did. I bet he thinks I'm a jerk. Oh well. I don't know what came over me.
I told Laura at the Graduation Party. She advised, " Talk to him... Be friendly, and fun, and flirt just a little bit - But not enough so that he'll notice straight away...Give him time to realise that he likes you, and then he'll pick up on all your flirting...". Well alright. I'll do just that.
I guess my new look helps me to 'get noticed'.
Auror training starts in a week or so.
I noticed a sign in this new store named 'Lost Legends'. It sounds and looks so cool. I decided to go and try out for the job. A part-time job will help out with the income, so that I can live without totally depending on my parent's fortunes. And the place seems so cool. Just from the window, I can see huge piles of books. It almost makes my mouth water... HA! I just want to get my grubby hands on 'em.
Yeah... I'm meeting up with the owner today at 8:00. Oh! It's 7:30! Better go and get ready. I have to be presentable.
Oh! Almost forgot! You might be wondering why I have thumbnails of my past and present self on the next two pages. Funny story. Molly and Arthur sent me those. They took them, 'to remember me by'. Thought I'd just keep them there. You know why. Hey, those two pages can be my photo gallery.
Oh! And I finally took my father's fortune. I'm writing this in London, at the Amber estate. Weird, how I just forgot, eh?
"Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." [/i] Stacey Amber[/size][/color]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Aug 27, 2008 11:30:56 GMT -7
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Sept 10, 2008 14:52:58 GMT -7
Wednesday September 10, 2008 These make me sad when I look at them, but on the next page are pictures of my mom. Most may be of her in her prime Hogwarts years, but she did die two years later. Three pictures of Dad have turned up. Very few were taken, unfortunately, because their marriage only lasted 2 years. Huh.
Love you Mom. Love you Dad.
God... I just blotted the page. Molly and Arthur are here too.
"A child needs a grandparent, anybody's grandparent, to grow a little more securely into an unfamiliar world."
Stacey Amber
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Sept 10, 2008 15:22:42 GMT -7
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Nov 2, 2008 6:52:14 GMT -7
Sunday November 2,2008[/u] Hey. It's been a while. Not much has happened. I got some freetime on my hands today. Guess what I did?
That's right. I thought about Padril. I've decided. He'll never come to me. Indeed. When I was in sixth year, I hardly thought about him. Seventh year... Changed it all. ...I guess I'll just have to get over him. Or live with the heartache. Let's do both, shall we.
On a lighter note, my job's going well at Lost Legends.
Cheers.
"Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop..." [/i] Stacey Amber[/size][/color]
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Here to Stay
Adult Witch Metamorphagus Auror Trainee April '08 MOTM[M0n:-100]
343
posts
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likes
Now and again we try; To just stay alive; It's not too late, It's never too late
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Post by Stacey Amber on Jan 2, 2009 8:37:22 GMT -7
Monday, December 30th, 2008[/b] Jaden called a party at New Year's Eve. Might as well go and have a little - no, a LOT - of fun. Maybe get drunk. Play a piano if she has one, or something. UN-amaze them with my talent. Ugh. Does my writing really look like that.
...
...I'm not going to mention Padril much in this diary anymore. It's clear what he thinks, though how does he know? It's clear form our meeting at the bar! But, I still want him to be my friend. Besides, I realize now that I don't have a chance. I must move on. Just becuase one guy doesn't give a f***, doesn't mean others don't .
"I don't care... I will move on..." [/i] Stacey Amber[/font][/color]
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